Finish Strong With Fearless Faith

Your Words Matter! #50

April 04, 2022 Fearless Faith Season 2 Episode 50
Finish Strong With Fearless Faith
Your Words Matter! #50
Show Notes Transcript

How do  people feel when they finish talking with you? When we finish a conversation with somebody, we leave either feeling uplifted and better, or more down and discouraged.   This episode of “Finish Strong” speaks on  the power of our words!  Our words can actually impact people emotionally and spiritually. We can build people up or tear them down.  We can motivate them or discourage them.  We can lift somebody higher, or drag them lower.  We can inspire to greatness or push to mediocrity.  The choice is yours to speak death or life!

Dan, Terry, and Brian will help you live your life with purpose, change someone’s life for the better and leave a lasting impact on those around you. Everyone starts the race... but only the Fearless Finish Strong!
 
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Terry Steen:

I ran across this article that I wanted to read real quick, which are 20 things that you should

Dan Wheeler:

know. We're gonna are we gonna indulge him or what? Okay, don't go anything's

Terry Steen:

20 to be quick, it's all proverbs and there's a couple others. This is all in the Bible.

John Matarazzo:

Live your life with purpose, change someone's life for the better and leave a lasting impact on those around you. Welcome to finish strong the podcast designed to help you discover your unique purpose and develop a plan to leave a powerful legacy. Dan, Brian and Terry are ready. So let's get started. The famous

Dan Wheeler:

poet Emily Dickinson once said, I know nothing in the world that has as much power as a word. Sometimes I write one, and I look at it until it begins to shine. Another person said, one kind word can change someone's entire day. And finally, another person said your words carry amazing power. So when you speak, make sure you uplift someone and never put them down. Those last two are by a guy named a nonnamous. Have you ever heard of Mr. nonnamous? Guys, a nonnamous? I don't know he's got all these quotes. I've heard of him. Yeah, he must have been like a philosopher. I mean, I

Terry Steen:

tried to figure out what his first name was whether it was Arthur a if anybody

Dan Wheeler:

listening knows who he is.

Brian Roland:

That sounds that sounds like Confucius. He said, who say I say all those things.

Dan Wheeler:

By the way, I'm Dan Wheeler. And you're listening to finish strong. I'm joined by pride Roland Terry Steen, those are those other crazy voices listening. How are you guys doing? By the way, everything good. Everything up to date or Kansas City.

Brian Roland:

Everything's gonna listen.

Terry Steen:

Great, great. Great, my friend. Always a pleasure to get together here and do these things. They've been a blast. And as you know, we began to get a little more momentum every time and so it's been exciting.

Dan Wheeler:

Ride some tell your friends about finished strong. The title of this episode is your words are powerful. Do you realize there's power to your words? I mean, Brian, you can uplift someone and make them feel better after you talk to them? Or you can make them feel down and discouraged. Do you ever think how people feel after they finish talking to you? You know,

Brian Roland:

I have thought about that. Um,

Dan Wheeler:

Terry, and I have to we've talked, you know,

Terry Steen:

behind your back. Yeah. Apparently, that's why we're talking about this, right.

Brian Roland:

So counselling? No, it's I have thought about that. And how well my words reflect on other people. And I've said it before how I may spout off one time and some guy that was driving kind of erratically and how he responded back to me by waving me sign. And, and I knew that I had over spoke my

Dan Wheeler:

bones. But wasn't the kind of wave you wanted to see it not always what

Brian Roland:

I want to say no, I was I thought, oh, here we go. But when I go into a store, too, and I are talking to somebody, I'd even ask them for information. It's just just the way you say it to him where you thank them. We wish him well for that day. It just it's easy to see them just lift up a little bit and say, well, thank you. Yeah, no, and it does make a difference. Just Just a word of word of kindness to someone.

Dan Wheeler:

Terry, the Bible says, the power of our words can speak death or life. Yeah, that's that's something to think about.

Terry Steen:

That is strong, isn't it? I think that's part of why the Bible tells us that the words of our mouth, that should be our prayer, that the words of our mouth, and the meditation of our heart would be acceptable in God's sight. Because we always need to be thinking about that. It's it's a powerful thing. And the self control that it takes, you know, I will talk about it later. But it talks about how tough it is to control a rule the tongue and we can't do it without the Holy Spirit in our life. That's one of the fruits of the spirit self control.

Dan Wheeler:

You know, there's so much in Proverbs, there's so much in James about the tongue and trying to tame the tongue. I mean, how many times have you said something maybe in a moment of anger in the rest of your life? You wish you hadn't said that? Because while people can forgive you, they really don't totally forget. And you can make such an impact. And I'm going to go out on a limb here and tell you a story. One of my daughters before she got married at pregnant and my wife called me up, I was working out one day and she said, Now, I'm going to tell you something. I need you to be really mature. But she knew you Well, if you guys knew Beth yet. And she told me and I'm like, what? My angel, I proceed to go downstairs, I had this big exercise ball and I was kicking it and punching it. But you know what? When she came home, I knew that I had about 30 seconds to either solidify my relationship with her forever, or to ruin it forever. A lot of parents have not reacted in the right way. And God and my wife gave me the wisdom when she came home was waiting for and I ran out, I threw my arms around her. And I said, I love you. And we're going to get through this, I'm going to help you all the way. And she's happily married today, three kids, and that grandson of mine is just my best buddy. And, you know, God can work all things out. But that was one time when I knew my words, were going to impact the rest of our lives. Yeah. And we have to be thinking about that. Every day.

Terry Steen:

You know, you, Dan, you you talk about that relationship with your wife. Well, that's, you know, everything I've read said that a father has so much impact on their daughters. And the words they speak into their daughter's life changes everything. And we have to keep that type of stuff in mind. We can build them up, we can tear them down. We can talk about how beautiful they are, and all the attributes that build their self esteem to where they don't have to find it somewhere else. So we do have that responsibility, that's for sure.

Dan Wheeler:

Yeah. And today, she and her husband are youth leaders and their family are all Christians. And they're in the word and, you know, God worked that situation out beautifully. Go ahead, Brian.

Brian Roland:

Say I once worked with Jerry Lucas, basketball player. These be with the Knicks and the Cincinnati Royals at the Times played Ohio State.

Dan Wheeler:

Remember, check, Mark, but he had a great yeah.

Brian Roland:

I remember him with his daughter when she was just becoming of age where she was going to start dating in them. And he said he was taking her out on a date. And he drove up to open the door for her. She got in the car, he got to the restaurant helped her with their seat, the whole thing. He did everything as a gentleman. And he said, Any guy that does not do any of these things, walk away, turn away. This is what how you should be treated. And I thought, wow, that was amazing what he did for her right in what he spoke to her right then. And of course, that was his angel, like you said with Kiersten course, and you know, nationally, but that just solidified those two. Yeah, yeah, it really made all the difference in the world and our dating life going guy came up and blew the horn and she's go out that's it.

Dan Wheeler:

Right? You know, I read today words are powerful. They have the, the ability to D to create a moment and the strength to destroy it. So that's what that was about. You can you know, destroy someone, or you can create and motivate and inspire you understand the power of the tongue man is powerful. And I liked what you said, Terry, may the words of my mouth be acceptable in my site? Oh, Lord, the meditations of my heart. I mean, that should be our prayer every day. Yeah. And James 119 learned to be quick to listen and slow to speak. That's, that's something I continue to work. Listen, and think about what you're going to say before you say it. Don't just spout it out.

Brian Roland:

That's the truth. You know, if anybody would just take a beat before they would say something. And just take one thought as to what am I saying? And how is this gonna? How's this going to be accepted? Now? How people gonna react? I think it would change all of our answers. Every time we have we'd have a situation come up. I know in my case, I was always Dan I think you might remember there's times when

Dan Wheeler:

Oh yeah. I used to work with you and you were directing and I was on camera. Because the flamer

Brian Roland:

and even those when I my golf game, my backswing I be yelled at the guy behind me. But had to learn how to take a beat. Listen, think before you say something think what you're gonna say,

Terry Steen:

well, doesn't Doesn't the Bible say something about where there are many words sin is not far away. Oh, that's not the exact translation but it says it.

Dan Wheeler:

Yeah. And Terry it also says in Proverbs 1020 The tongue of the righteous is like choice silver. What do you think he means by that the author?

Terry Steen:

Well, yeah, if the that silver has great values, so the tongue can add value to a person just like we were talking about our daughters, but anyone else? We come in contact with, we can add great value when you walk away from someone who has built you up and talk positive. Man, you feel like you're worth more, don't

Dan Wheeler:

you? I know we all had great moms and my mom instilled so much confidence in me, I swear that she was the key to my success. She always said, Danna, you can do whatever you set your mind to whatever God calls you to. She always believed that I would be a preacher. And now finally I am but you know, before she died, we were doing these morning cups of inspiration. And she would listen. And, Brian, I know your mom built you up. She was so proud of you as well, huh?

Brian Roland:

No, it's true. She was and I remember my dad though asking me. What are you going to do when you grow up? And I said, I'm gonna be a mailman like you and he goes, No, you're not. Okay, get some that

Dan Wheeler:

wasn't mailman because Terry, your dad, wait, I think was a mailman.

Terry Steen:

My dad was a government employee as well. True.

Dan Wheeler:

Yeah. They're in the mail. quality stuff. Yeah. You know, I thought back as I was preparing for this today, when I was 23 years old, I was at a Bible study. In my hometown of St. Joe, Michigan, I was back on vacation, because I was working in Springfield, Missouri, but um, a woman prophesied over me. And she said, your name is Daniel. And you have, you will have the great ability to either lead people down the wrong path, and do a lot of harm. Or you can inspire a lot of people and do a lot of good and I never forgot about that. No one else. We can go one way or the other. But our words are the key. And aren't you thankful, Terry, that God's called us into this ministry where we can use God's words and our words to inspire people to walk closer

Terry Steen:

with the Lord. Yeah, yeah, it's really neat. And, and it's that says again, in Proverbs, that the lips of the righteous nourish many. So that's a great opportunity that we have here at Fearless faith and our finished strong podcasts to actually provide growth you know, as we nourish that's growing people. And that's just our heart's desire is to have people grow in the Lord and then encourage them and build them up. It's all part of what the Lord tells us to do. It's great.

Dan Wheeler:

Now on the other side of that coin, words, can have negativity. We talked about our words, speak life. We've mentioned that or negativity. In Proverbs 1218 says, words can wound like a sword. And I know that I've been guilty of that. I've had said some words that have wounded people. Boy, do I regret it.

Brian Roland:

Yeah, I've done the same thing then. You do you think about it. Later on. You're going oh, man, I just didn't really just destroyed the spirit. I've just cut it in half. And what it could have been such a difference maker just approach it a different way. But it's true. And I think what I think about more now than anything, though, and it's it's really, from Matthew 1237. About for your words, but we'll be acquitted, but you'll be acquitted by your words are condemned. And I go man at your home the only hacker he can't take back any of these words. I can do his thing from here on out. I don't I don't want to be condemned by it. You know, but every day do somebody go, oh, man, you know, he's condemned from that one. I gotta be acquitted. So that's, that's keep that in your thoughts. Your words are powerful, but they're also were to be judged on our words, too. Besides our works, and besides our salvation.

Terry Steen:

Yeah, yeah, it's so true. Hey, if you guys will indulge me for a minute, I ran across this article that I wanted to read real quick, which are 20 things that you quitted

Dan Wheeler:

are we gonna are we gonna indulge him or what okay for

Brian Roland:

things.

Terry Steen:

To be quick, it's all proverbs. And there's a couple others. This is all in the Bible. And you don't open your mouth in the heat of anger, when you don't have all the facts when you haven't verified the story. If your words offend a weaker brother, or if your words are a poor reflection of the Lord, or if you're tempted to tell a joke about sin, or when you should be ashamed of your words later, or when you're tempted to make light of holy things or when you convey a wrong impression, or the issues none of your business or when you're tempted to tell a lie, or when they damage someone's reputation or destroy a friendship, or when you're feeling critical. And if he can't speak without yelling, when it's time to listen, if you don't have to eat your words later. And if you haven't said it more than one time, those are all things they need. To keep our mouth shut, so the Bible talks about it so much

Brian Roland:

like my waxed over that when I was reading proverbs.

Dan Wheeler:

Wow, wow. What? I'm gonna bring in a younger man on this discussion. He's our producer, John Matarazzo. And, John, the reason I'm bringing you in is because because Brian and I have both produced live television, we know the pressures of it. And I know you've been there. Have Have you ever in the heat of the moment? or said something you regretted for a long time or heard someone else say something?

John Matarazzo:

Well, was damaging, like faux pas, or, like actually damaging things? Because there's been really funny things that have been said on set it one of my favorites was whatever somebody was doing to introduce the lead singer, the former lead singer, that he's still the lead singer of Petra, John schlitt. in yellow, just let your imagination take over there, but I did not go quite well.

Dan Wheeler:

Yeah, we all know, John, he seems with our buddy Jay secularists. Big guy.

John Matarazzo:

Yeah, I've seen I've seen enough. I've said enough in my days, too. Yeah.

Dan Wheeler:

Yeah. I mean, I used to see that it QVC you know, sometimes before midnight, when a vendor had all their money on the line, and they were worried about things going, I mean, tensions got so high, and I, boy, I learned to not, you know, raise the level of tension, I learned to calm and assure everyone, it was gonna be all right, that I knew what I was doing. I had to fake that sometimes. But of course, it was gonna be alright. But you know, a perverse of tongue, crushes the spirit, it can overwhelm it can depress. And proverbs 15, one says, A gentle answer turns away wrath. And, John, I'm sure you've seen that on the set that you're able to calm people down with a gentle answer, rather than Yeah, you have

John Matarazzo:

to respond that way. Especially if somebody is going to be an on air personality, you know, you have to calm them down before they get in front of the camera, because you don't want them to respond out of an emotion or reaction. You want them to be able to respond to questions and to be able to have a clear head. So as a producer, I always was trying to figure out how can I calm them down with whatever's going on and just bring peace to the situation? And just like that verse said, you know, a gentle answer turns away wrath.

Unknown:

Yeah, Brian,

Brian Roland:

you know, I was work with Barbara mandrill. And she just got finished producing a big special. And I said, you know, Barbara, is it just a little thing? I said, How did you get, get what you wanted to get done? Had these guys listen to you? And she just looked at me and said, you know, something wrong. And she goes, you couldn't get a lot more with sugar than you can with vinegar. And this is how she was she was sweetest could be but she got the job done needed if it was something that maybe they didn't want to do she just want them over to do it her way. Yeah, it was very successful.

Dan Wheeler:

But we all don't have that a bility. Not all of us do. So how then do we tame the tongue? We can tame tigers, tame lions, but the tongue. I mean, James talks about a terry it can. It's a restless evil, James calls it and chapter three verse eight, full of deadly poison. And then he also you know, he talks about that, with the same mouth we can praise God and then curse man who was created in God's image. It's, it's so easy,

Terry Steen:

but when you read it, you think Oh, no, there's no hope. Because He literally says no man can tame the tongue. So if we try to do it in ourself, right, it's not gonna happen, as we all know, over the course of time, just like little kids. They're learning self control. When they're little kids. They say anything they want to say, remember that Art Linkletter show? Right? Just say the darndest. Yeah. So So you start there, and you can't do it on your own. And that's why the Bible tells us that whatever is in your heart determines what you say. And that's the key, isn't it? That if no, if people do not remember anything else about this podcast, if they could focus in on that, if they truly want to try to control their tongue, if they truly want to speak life, it starts in the heart. So if you're struggling with your words, check

Dan Wheeler:

your heart. We have to change our heart to change our words held true, Luke 645, what you say flows from what is in your heart. So Brian wants to take us through the three ways that we can harness the power of our words. These are really critical. Yeah.

Terry Steen:

Before you go there. Let me mention one other thing that is, I think we have time a perfect example. and you can't get a better example than Jesus, when you're talking about the purity of heart, and being able to speak positive. And I was thinking about that time when Jesus was in his last days, he was ready to be crucified. And I was reading in mark the 14th, and the 15th chapter. And it was so interesting that Jesus never felt like he had to defend himself. Oh, yeah, the only time he spoke is when it was important. The only time like, he remained silent, gave no answer. But then they said, Are you the Christ? And he said, I am, um, Jesus. And so he spoke then. And then they asked him, Are you king of the Jews? He said, Yes, it is, as you say, they made further accusations. He didn't answer him for anything he didn't feel like he had to. So Jesus only spoke about what was important. He didn't get down in the mud. He didn't defend himself. He didn't worry about hearsay, he didn't worry about opinion. And He only spoke the things that were critical at that time, turning to the robber on the one side and saying, Hey, you will be with Me in Paradise, and saying it's finished. And I just thought that was a neat thought to reflect on Jesus being the ultimate example of how we should try to control our tongues. Yeah,

Dan Wheeler:

I'm glad you got that in because he was very efficient with his words, he didn't waste words, right? You know. And, you know, sometimes people just shoot off at the mouth and go on and on. Have you ever had someone, maybe maybe a friend or someone you no longer hang around with, but whenever you talk to them, it's all about them. And they never asked you about you. It's just you die and you hang up and you go, they didn't ask me one thing about me. I mean, I don't feel like they care about me. And it's hard to be around. But Brian, on to those three ways to harness the power of our words before Terry, so rudely nod just give us the three ways that we learn about in Scripture to harness the power of our words.

Brian Roland:

The first is to speak slowly, and over in James 119, and says, Wherefore, my beloved brethren, let every man be swift to hear, slow to speak, and slow to wrath. So the first would need to speak slowly. The second is speak truthfully. Ephesians 425. It says, Therefore, each of you must put off falsehood and speak truthfully to your neighbor. For we are all members of one body. That's a good one. There. We are all members of the Body of Christ. And so we have to speak truthfully. And then speak graciously. Colossians four, six tells us, Let your conversation be always full of grace. Season with salt, so that you may know how to answer everyone. I think that is great to season with salt. Dan, you and I met Terry, we like the barbecue we like to cook. And what a difference it makes when you're seasoning it. I mean, a flat piece of meat when you see that, oh, man, it just brings all the flavour out. And the same thing with our speech and our talk with we season it with salt, they will know the answer to everything. Yeah,

Dan Wheeler:

we the Bible says we are the salt of the earth. And we have to sprinkle our conversations, salt. And again, it comes back to what's in the heart. Right want to change your words, change your heart, ask God to change you. Maybe you're listening and you've had trouble with your temper. You've had trouble keeping your mouth shut when maybe that was the thing to do. The Bible says Speak slowly. speak truthfully. Speak graciously. Mm hmm. So we're ready to wrap up. But you know, we need to finish strong in life by controlling our tongue speaking life, encouragement, inspiration and motivation to others. I mean, you think throughout all of history, great leaders have inspired people so much with their words, and a great preacher can raise us up to where you feel like you can touch the heavens and, and want to live your life for God's We hope we've done that for you today. We hope we've inspired Any final thoughts, Terry?

Terry Steen:

Yeah, yeah, I think two things that come to my mind that are kind of sticking in our discussion is one, especially as Christians that we're responsible to uplift people encourage them. So there's a responsibility there with the words God's given us. And then to we're accountable for every word we speak. So we're responsible and accountable for our words. I'm going to focus on that in the future. Yeah, and

Brian Roland:

you're gonna be doing that now. today. Thank you so much. But as I fight it every day, but you know, it's just, I'm dealing with it.

Dan Wheeler:

Well, I'm gonna quote that famous philosopher again, a nanny musk. In conclusion. He said, Be sure to taste your words before you spit them out. It's really true. Taste them. The Bible says Oh, taste and see that the Lord is good. Vitamin D your heart, be LED by His Holy Spirit. Help him to control your tongue and speak out of a heart that is abundant with love and grace. Boy, we've had fun guys, it is always so great. The time flies by Yeah, we're so grateful that you joined us for another episode of finish strong, and tell your friends about it. Use your words to inspire them and say hey, check these three crazy guys out. And we want to thank our producer John Matarazzo as well for putting this all together God bless. Tame your tongue. Watch your words.

John Matarazzo:

Thank you for listening to finish strong. For more information about finished strong and fearless faith. Check out their website F faith.org. Make sure that you rate and review this podcast to help more people accomplish their God given purpose so that together we can finish