Are Your Priorities Out of Order? #04

Hosts Dan Wheeler, Terry Steen, and Brian Roland discuss how if our priorities are critical.  When they are out of order it will affect everything in our life and we need to focus on the "one thing" that can bring everything back into it's proper order. 

 They will help you live your life with purpose, change someone’s life for the better and leave a lasting impact on those around you. Everyone starts the race... but only the Fearless Finish Strong!
 
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 ffaith.org

Transcript

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Terry Steen: 0:02

It was interesting that the word priority was only a singular word until about the 1900s. And then for some reason it became plural and became priorities. But the real definition of priority was the one thing.

John Matarazzo: 0:21

Live your life with purpose changed someone's life for the better, and leave a lasting impact on those around you. Welcome to finish strong, the podcast designed to help you discover your unique purpose and develop a plan to leave a powerful legacy. Keeping our priorities in line can be quite a challenge. So today, Brian, Dan and Terry focus on what is most important in your life. Here's Dan, to kick off today's conversation.

Dan Wheeler: 0:47

Let me ask you, what is the most important thing in your life? That's what we're talking about today, unfinished, wrong, your priorities. We're gonna have some fun, we're gonna talk about a scene from a movie that I think depicts this. So well, setting your priorities I'm going to discuss some of the pain I experienced when my wife had stage four cancer and how my priorities were flipped all around. Brian and Terry are here. And guys, we all think about when our priorities were out of line, and it becomes imperative every day to kind of recheck your priorities. Would you agree? Absolutely. Yeah, it really does. You sometimes don't realize it till you're into it. But when you're going through the throes of life, and everything seems against Yeah, usually you can sit back and go, Oh, man, my priorities are screwed up.

Brian Roland: 1:41

You fight you find out where where you went wrong. I mean, I tell them all the time, I lay in bed at night, and I go with my through my day, and I'm going, Oh, my gosh, I can't believe I did this or did that. And it's true. And it's Same thing with whatever you're deciding to do through your life, you can actually go back and see where you took that stuff out.

Dan Wheeler: 1:58

Yeah, we do that every day. But then we have to look at the big picture. What are our main priorities? Are they money, success, family, and work?

Terry Steen: 2:09

Yeah, interesting. You say that, Dan, because I was reading the other day. And it was interesting that the word priority was only a singular word until about the 1900s. And then for some reason, it became plural and became priorities. But the real definition of priority was the one thing so it's kind of crazy to think that we now have priorities, that it's plural, and that we have 510 15 one things in our life. And that's probably what's creating some of the chaos that we sent in our life and that other people's sense in their own life. And if you go to Scripture, the Old Testament had 613 commandments telling us what to do. A nd it was so interesting that Jesus took all those commandments, boiled it down into two,

Dan Wheeler: 3:08

and we're going to get to that Yeah, Jesus firs t. Brian in the Old Testament Solomon talked about

Brian Roland: 3:14

He sure did, he had it all, but he says it over in my at Ecclesiastes 211. This I considered all my activities which my hands had done, and the labor which I had exerted and behold, all was vanity, and striving after the wind, and there was no profit under the sun. Isn't that amazing?

Dan Wheeler: 3:36

Yeah, it really is. Stay tuned, because Terry's gonna tell you what Jesus told us. Our priority should be but first I want to talk about a movie called city slickers. Guys do you remember did did you watch anyone watch that movie?

Brian Roland: 3:50

It was hilarious. Norman was the calf wasn't Norman I think was the calf. That was enough. I think that

Dan Wheeler: 3:56

may have been egg pallets and Billy Crystal started and check pallets was this old, salty cowboy. And they were driving the herd moving the herd and Billy Crystal played the part of Mitch so Curley was jack Palance curlies talking to Mitch, and clearly says, you know, you city slickers, you come out here, and you spend two weeks you spend all year working yourself into all these knots. And you come out here and you think that two weeks of riding a horse and, and driving the cattle is going to untie all those nuts. He goes, you don't know what life is all about. And, and Mitch says, Well, what is life all about? And jack Palance holds up his index finger, and he says this, and, and Mitch says your finger goes no. The one thing this is the secret to life is the one thing and and and Mitch goes well, what is it? What is the one thing and Curley says? Well, that's for you to figure out. And Terry, Jesus told us he had all figured out what the one in the

Terry Steen: 5:02

A did and you know the wisdom of the old codger. I mean, that is so good. And it's so important, we have to choose what's best. There's a lot of good things out there. We can't choose them all, we have to choose what's best. And Jesus I mentioned, there were 613 commandments in the Old Testament. Jesus brought it all together in Mark 12. And I want to read a couple of those verses here, the 30th and the 31st verse. And when we talk about priorities, I think this in a nutshell, will do it for us. It says to love the Lord your God with all your heart, with all your soul, with all your mind. And with all your strength. This is the first commandment. But then he goes on to say, and the second is like this, you should love your neighbor as yourself. There's no commandment greater than the so he's telling us If you love me, if you love others, and then also you have to love yourself to love others. If you'll do those three things, that becomes the priority of life. Loving.

Dan Wheeler: 6:15

Yeah. You know, Jesus, I always remember the acronym joy. If you want real joy, your priorities are Jesus first. Others second, and yourself. Last. And it really is true. But there's so many things that can keep us from that priority of loving God first. I mean, we have so many distractions in life,

Terry Steen: 6:38

we really do. And, you know, I think that's the first thing you got to do is kind of go if I'm not loving God, like I should, why am I not? Is it work? Is it too much play? Is it our time management that keeps us from doing it? Maybe it's technology could be sin in our life, it could be failures, there's any number of things. But until we sit down and reflect on that and get those things out of our life, we'll never truly be able to get our priorities straight in loving God the way he wants us to.

Dan Wheeler: 7:11

You know, Brian, I remember when we were in Chicago, working in Christian television, and you won an Emmy Award. And that kind of became everybody's goal. If I could only win an Emmy. And I remember you got up and and you gave a great acceptance speech. And you talked about our volleyballs up and coming. But I'm sure it was great in the moment. But then I mean, then the me sits on a shelf.

Brian Roland: 7:34

Actually, yeah, I have a couple of things down here in the garage. So it's absolutely right. Yeah, they're in a box somewhere. Right. It's right. With the angel award. So yeah, they're all out there. Yeah, but but I remember that too, because you're right. I think the volleyball team and I forgot to thank my crew, and I heard about priorities.

Dan Wheeler: 7:57

Absolutely. Absolutely. Matthew, I think in chapter six, verse 19, Christ said to the disciples, do not store up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal but store up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where moth and rust do not destroy and where thieves do not break in and steal For where your treasure is there. Your heart is also every day, we have to guard our heart. We have to you know, make sure that those priorities are in order. And you know, there came a time in my life actually, what was the springboard for us forming fearless faith was when my wife Beth became ill. I mean, very ill. And I'll never forget when I heard the word stage for cancer, it changed everything. I mean, I realized my priorities were out of whack. I wanted to be the best host on QVC. I wanted to always have the best shows I wanted to interview the best people. Suddenly, that all meant nothing. Yeah, I bet. I realized that caring for Beth seeing her through this was going to be my priority, along with prayer. I mean, I started praying and I prayed without ceasing. And God was the priority and my priorities for those three years were were right. And looking back now though, I can say God truly uses all things. It says in Romans 828 all things work together for good to them that love God. And even now looking back and saying good came out of my wife's passing. Well, fearless faith came out of that. A couple books came out of that. And sometimes circumstances though, Mm hmm. can change our priorities.

Terry Steen: 9:40

Yeah, they really can. They really can and, and you obviously realize the importance of investing in time with God and loving God and sometimes those circumstances help bring that more to the forefront. And that's something I've tried hard to do. I guess we all do, but I think it will come Honestly, seek to put God first I tried to have my devotions first thing in the morning, spend some strong, valuable time there reading the Bible and praying and praising God. And that helps set the tone for my whole day. And helps me kind of refocus on what my priority is, first of all investing in him. And then I think he kind of sets me up, where I can then love, invest in others, invest in myself as the day goes on. But, you know, to stay consistent in our walk with the Lord, we have to invest that time early on and showing that we love and

Dan Wheeler: 10:39

well, we talk about others, and Beth was obviously close to me. But Brian, you had something happen early in your life, that really kind of affected your priorities.

Brian Roland: 10:49

That's right. But it has to do with another death. Unfortunately, it was my father's he passed away. Right after I graduated from college, within months, I mean, a couple months later, and my mom was only 50 at the time. But she never remarried. She never dated. She never had the desire to and my sister and I would say, Mom, get out there, you know, just have fun date somebody, and she would never do. And she I asked her why. And she says because your dad was love of my life. And nobody could ever love me like he did. And he she but her priority changed at that time. She wasn't. she'd seen other people remarrying that and things that went through and she was it was never the same. But she knew where she stood. She had her church, she had her friends, she had her family. And then she and she was an office manager. And she went on after she retired, she wanted to do like we're doing, she wanted to give back. So she joined us with a mission. And she ended up traveling all over the world with it like goodness, and she was in she was just fulfilling what she could do for other people to fill her life out to that she could take it to the end and finish strong. But she did that because she, she wasn't selfish. She wanted to give back. She didn't want to remarry in that and go through that whole thing again, because she's had the best and she wanted to live with that memory, but be able to give what she had forward to everybody else.

Dan Wheeler: 12:04

So back to my acronym joy, Jesus others, and then yourself, you know, Terry, sometimes you feel like you're not supposed to love yourself or take care of yourself. But Jesus said, Love your neighbors as yourself.

Terry Steen: 12:17

Yeah, that's true. And sometimes when we, you know, as Christians, we think, Oh, it's always got to, we have to serve others. And that has to be such a priority. But if you don't take care of yourself, you're not really going to be able to serve others the way God wants you to. And even in that scripture that I read, it says the love the Love the Lord your God with all your heart, soul, mind and strength. So there's all these parts of your body, your spirit, you have to take care of your spirit. I mentioned that devotion time and it's so critical for all of us to do that on a daily basis. And in

Dan Wheeler: 12:53

No, Terry has a depth of wisdom that I can only our mind, if we don't keep our mind sharp, God can't use us as effectively. That's one thing I've done over the years has been decades now. I make myself read at least two books a month. So I read a minimum of 24 books a year. I listened to a podc sts. What do they have to have? They have to have a lot of pict res. But half of them are omic books, but whatever it tak s to get to 24 Terry, have you eard of the Hardy Boys? say is still No, I'm just kidding. But no, you you have always kept a good balance. And you can tell when things are out of balance. I remember when one year I worked 29 days out of 30 days in the month of September I was I traveled to Italy It was during the Mark McGwire Sammy Sosa home run race. I was on QVC every night every day. And they actually gave me an award for it. little bonus. It was nice, but I thought man, I've got no time for anything else. It was just crazy. But we have to be careful, don't wait. Because if we don't set our own priorities, someone else can dictate our priorities. And that is a danger. JOHN, you know, I'm gonna bring in our producer here. He's a young man, but I'm sure you've seen how people will try to influence you. Do you and question you sometimes on what your priorities are?

John Matarazzo: 14:31

Oh, all the time. It's it's easy to get pulled in different directions. And one of the things that I live by and I actually have this posted up at work, the main thing is to keep the main thing the main thing Yeah, and perfect. That really helps me make decisions and you know, once you know the vision that you're that you're applying to your life and that you're trying to to live out. when something doesn't line up with that main thing. It's easier to say no to it. So yeah, something that's been a huge, huge help for me

Dan Wheeler: 15:03

back to city slickers. I think of Curley holding up his finger and saying, it's the one thing in Mitch, the Manos, that's for you to figure out, we all have to have to figure out what the main

Terry Steen: 15:15

Yeah. And as we're loving, I've think back I spent 12 years at two different churches as executive pastor. And when you get on staff at a church, you can be potentially pulled so many ways by so many different people. And I had to sit and kind of build a priority structure for myself on how I treated others. And what I thought was more important, and I always I tried to put my wife first, my daughter Second, the church had to come in third. And then my friends came in after that. And once I got that priority structure in place, that helped me with my time management, my use of energy and allowed me to have a pretty strong marriage. My wife's not here to dispute that. So I'll say, a pretty strong marriage, a great daughter, and good friends. But it all comes down to that structure and the priorities.

Dan Wheeler: 16:14

So now I know I didn't hear for from you for 10 years, I was at the bottom of your friends, apparently. So. What Romans 12 two says, do not conform any longer to the pattern of this world, but be transformed by the renewing of your mind, then you will be able to test and approve what God's will is his good and pleasing and perfect will. And I think we have to be careful that we're not conformed to the world, that we are setting our own priorities and making sure they're in line with God's priorities.

Terry Steen: 16:52

Yeah, it's so easy to to let that slip, isn't it it is the things of the world start to creep in. And we start to worry about this and that and then we try to attack the worry and get rid of what's going on there. And really, that wasn't a priority to begin with. We shouldn't have been worrying about that to start.

Dan Wheeler: 17:13

Yeah, I remember my dad after he left my mom, his second marriage was really bad. This woman was mainly after his money and, and then he got her, her mother to come in and take control of his office and actually fired a woman that had been with him his whole career, really helped him build his business. I remember thinking, Man, what is wrong with him? Even as a kid, I thought he's all screwed up. He's got his priorities wrong. And he, you know, at the end of his life, he had a lot of regrets. And I think we have to think about that. You know, in our final days, what will our regrets be? Well, I regrets will be when we had our priorities out of balance. And, you know, Brian, I we talk a lot about how the three of us are so fortunate to have had godly parents, you know, my mom was such a strong Christian. And my dad came around near the end of his life, but I know he had a lot of regrets. And I think our parents, all three of us had parents that at least my mom had no regrets. And I know you guys, both your parents were strong. You

Brian Roland: 18:21

know, my mom, I don't think had any regrets, either. I mean, she was so strong. And you could tell by Bible that she had one of my Bibles, and she just wrote constantly, I learned so much from that. I was praying the other day I was reading I was going Thank You, Lord, that my mom gave me this gift. All this knowledge in here that she got gathered through the years in the different services she was in. But you know, my dad, he was my mom was his mentor and Christ because she led them to the Lord. And on his deathbed, he looked at her and he says, My mom's name is Josephine. He said, Jody. So do you think God can forgive me for the things I couldn't do? And she goes, What are you talking about? Of course, my dad just didn't know. He just felt like he couldn't. He didn't like to pray in front of a lot of people. He didn't feel like he was worthy enough to take so many people before the throne of the Lord. And it's little things like that, you know, where he felt unworthy where he wasn't when he really wasn't. But my mom was a strength in the family and that end of it, and she had to get it. He had to hear from her that sure God's he's forgives you for everything. He's, he's not gonna look at you what you think are shortcomings?

Dan Wheeler: 19:25

Yeah, you know, I think a lot of us we talk about our priorities about listening to God and the Bible. And we talk about others. Well, another area where others can really be influential is finding people who have gained a lot of wisdom in life. I know we should have because we're all in our 60s, Brian's even cross the 70s. But, you know, we have a little wisdom. Hopefully, john, our young producer here will learn something from our wisdom, but it's something to think about, what legacy will we leave for younger people, the generation behind?

Terry Steen: 19:58

Yeah, and there's no way But we could leave the legacy that we want to leave. If we don't, as john said, keep the main thing, the main thing, if we don't have love, let's translate the foundation to everything we do in life, then the odds are, we will not leave the legacy that we hope to leave. When that time comes. That's for sure.

Brian Roland: 20:23

But you know, guys over and Colossians Three, two, the Bible tells us sit your minds on things that are above Yeah, not on things that are on Earth. I think that that tells the whole story right there too. When we keep our mind and our focus on Jesus. That's the whole difference in the world.

Dan Wheeler: 20:41

And that ties back to what Jesus said in Matthew six, where he talked about, lay not up for yourselves treasures on earth, right? Because treasures on earth are temporary. Yeah. And we've got to keep our eye on the eternal. I read somewhere that we need to, you know, kind of be in the world and live in the world, but also keep an eye on eternity.

Brian Roland: 21:03

That's true. And it's, it's sometimes easier to say than to do. But we have to do that. And we have to everything that we go through through life, we have to keep our eye on our priority. And like john said, The main thing is the main thing, and you get it, if you keep your focus on that, then you're going to be able to get through everything that happens daily in your life.

Dan Wheeler: 21:23

Yeah.

Terry Steen: 21:24

And who would have thought that a crusty old cowboy in city slickers would have cut through all of this in handy answer for us. It's

Dan Wheeler: 21:35

it's pretty amazing. that's a that's a great tie back, Jerry, you know, you, you open with something and you come back to it, but it's true. It's this the one thing now I say to you that are listening, it's up to you to figure out what that one thing is. And I remember when my mom had passed, and we were we had the viewing and all the family was around. So many people talked about how she was a prayer warrior, and how close to God she was. And there was no doubt among any of us of where my mom is. I mean, she was in heaven. I know Beth met her when she arrived, and there was a celebration, but she did it. Right. And I think we all want to hear those words. And this was what we have to think about every day. What will Jesus say to us? Will we want him to say, Well done, good and faithful servant? I think we need to think about that.

Brian Roland: 22:34

Yeah, that's right. Absolutely.

Terry Steen: 22:36

That's right. It's all part of finishing strong, isn't it? It doesn't matter what stage in life you are. Once you get those port priorities lined up, everything else can fall into place.

Brian Roland: 22:50

And it tells us in Proverbs 16, three, commit your work to the Lord in your plans will be established.

Terry Steen: 22:55

Amen.

Dan Wheeler: 22:56

That's right. And we want to commit our work here at fearless faith to the Lord. And we strive every day to do that. We want to listen to the words of Christ when He says, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, with all thy soul with all the strength. And the second one is unto love thy neighbor as thyself. And as as Curley said, the one thing you got to figure it out, it's up to you figure it out. So we're so glad you're joining us for our finish strong podcast, we're just three guys who are kind of well past midlife. But we don't want to just retire and fade off into the background, we decided we wanted to finish strong, because we do want to hear those words from Christ. And if you're listening, and you're saying, Wow, I wonder what they'll say about me when I die. I wonder if I'm leaving a legacy. And I wonder, will I even get to heaven, you can know for sure that you're going there. Also you have to do is accept Jesus Christ into your heart, as your Lord and Savior, and say, Lord, I'm sorry for my sins. I'm a sinner, I failed you. But I want you to forgive me of all my sins, come into my heart, cleanse me and make me a new creature. And let me live my life in such a way so that I can truly finish strong, and hear those words. Well done, thou good and faithful servant. So Lord, I pray for everyone that prayed that prayer that you'll help them to grow in their faith. And we just thank you for this opportunity to talk about what is truly important in life, what our priorities and what our priority is. We ask it my name. Amen. Guys, that was another great podcast the time always flies by our thanks to John Matarazzo, our producer and it's been great having you with us. I hope you'll continue to read and watch and follow us on more episodes of Finished Strong.

John Matarazzo: 25:05

Thank you for listening to finish strong. For more information about finished strong and fearless faith, check out their website f faith.org. Make sure that you rate and review this podcast to help more people accomplish their God given purpose so that together we can finish strong